From now until the 29th, every time you search for porn on Google or Yahoo, you'll see Juicy Gossip stories about the wedding. Zingers such as "William, Kate practice for balcony kiss!" or William to arrive 45 minutes prior to Kate will be sure to keep you Hooked!
You can also gawk at Prime Minister David Cameron's ridiculous choice of outfit for the ceremony. Wow, what a character!
And don't forget about those delusional wackos who'll try an' profit from other Delusional Wackos! (I thought my block of sharp cheddar looked liked Steve Buscemi the other day, but did I try to hawk it? Hell no! I ate that block of cheese along with my Lyle Lovett sausage and Val Kilmer crackers goddammit!)
Don't let the Anticipation Kill You! It's only 11 days away. If you feel like you can't wait, just check out any of America's fine news outlets. They'll be sure to keep you up-to-date on everything from guest list to dinner menu.
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Example of over weight, sweaty American |
Take it home David......
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